Counting Blessing Instead Of Wrinkle Lines
Every day I wake up a little bit older. As I advance into middle age I check the mirror just a little more and see the crow’s feet starting to form as I apply more cream and think if it is really going to work. Yes it’s my fortieth birthday and I am feeling a bit old.
As I make my way down the stairs I am a bit stiff and wonder if leg arthritis is starting to set it. Great I think to myself, this is the age where all the major things in life are going to be shutting down in my body. I’m not close to retiring but I sure am not twenty five any more.
As I drop off the kids to school the rain begins to pour. Great, a perfect weather forecast to match my mood. When I get to work I realize I forgot my umbrella at home. Perfect, add it up to a bad hair day for my bad old birthday.
As I get to the office there are some festive balloons in my office surrounded by the proverbial over the hill you are 40 giant balloons that I get to stare at all day. They mean well, but it sure doesn’t add to my mood of feeling over the hill. So I delve into the cake they got me at lunch and think to myself why not, I’ll take the calories I’m over the hill anyway.
As I look at my ringing phone I see it is a birthday call from my best friend Lisa. She probably has the perfect fun filled dig to give me while reminding me she is two years younger. But as I answered I sense that she is upset. I ask her what is wrong but she tries to play it off.
She tries not to cry but I want to know what is wrong as she tells me, ‘I’m so sorry to tell you this today, but I just found out I have breast cancer and I really need a friend right now.’ After hearing this devastating news I feel awful. Here I am in my pity party of one and my best friend just got the worst news of her life. As I console her and tell her it is going to be okay I am slapping myself for being such a selfish idiot.
As I drive home I think to myself how fortunate I am. I have my health I don’t have to make up a disease. My kids are all healthy. I have a good job and roof over my head. There are so many people who have so much less than I do and they have joy. As I scold myself for being so innately stupid in my way of thinking I pull into the driveway where my husband and kids have made a special dinner for me and as I enter the door I no longer think about the crow’s feet but how blessed I truly am.
Tags: aging, living life to the fullest, self-esteem
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